Episode 14 – Toilet

14 minutes

“Checklist?” -Kiriyama

“Yeah, I was watching a beginner video for explorers by someone named Kunimaru-san. He was explaining some dungeon do’s and don’ts that should be checked frequently, so I wrote them down.” -Rokujou

“Yuuta, you’re so meticulous…” -Kiriyama

“I don’t want to hear that from someone who almost died recently.” -Rokujou

“Well, that’s true. But I don’t think we’ve forgotten anything.” -Kiriyama

“Verification and inspection. Never be too lazy to do it in the dungeon. It’s better than dying. More importantly, I’ll read out the checklist so you keep watch, okay?” -Rokujou

“Sure, sure.” -Kiriyama

The savanna on the first floor is overgrown because no one maintains it, so the grass is quite deep. If a goblin squats, you might miss it if you’re not careful.

We say that goblins in newly formed dungeons don’t have the smarts to hide, but in a dungeon that’s been around for a year, they learn and use such tactics.

“So, first item on the checklist.” -Rokujou 

“Go ahead.” -Kiriyama

“Is the handgun loaded with…bullets…?” -Rokujou

“…” -Kiriyama

We were at a loss for words. Indeed, we had forgotten. It’s not that there are no bullets at all, but we should be quite depleted.

“See, it’s really important to check and inspect.” -Kiriyama

Sweat trickles down Kiriyama-san’s forehead.

“Kiriyama-san, you keep watch. I’ll reload the magazine.” -Rokujou

Saying that, I took the magazine out of the handgun and started loading bullets into it. It would be stupid to forget this and run out of bullets during a fight with goblins, nearly dying again.

“Yuuta—” -Kiriyama

“What?” -Rokujou

“I’m a bit careless with things, but please look after me.” -Kiriyama

As I finished reloading the magazine, Kiriyama-san said something quite earnest.

“Well, I forgot about it until I read it too.” -Rokujou

“But I basically try to listen to what Yuuta says.” -Kiriyama

“The person in the video said, ‘People tend to forget things that aren’t a habit.’ So at first, it’s crucial to thoroughly check and inspect. In a dungeon, neglecting this can lead to death.” -Rokujou

But Kunimaru-san’s videos are really helpful, aren’t they?

Is it possible he doesn’t know that using a handgun doesn’t yield experience points?

No, maybe Kunimaru-san does know? And perhaps he’s already practicing the use of handguns against goblins like we do?

The reason for not saying it is simple. If you wrongly encourage close combat without using a handgun, it could easily lead to death. It’s not something to be recommended lightly in a video.

“It’s possible.” -Rokujou

“What is?” -Kiriyama

“Never mind, it’s fine. It’s been 10 minutes now.” -Rokujou

“Looks like it.” -Kiriyama

“Let’s decide on a strategy then. First, for groups of more than five goblins, we’ll reduce the number to four using bows instead of guns as the first move. If the arrows don’t hit well, then we’ll use guns. After that, we won’t run towards the goblins but approach slowly side by side.” -Rokujou

“Well, even if they don’t approach us, the goblins will come at us quickly as soon as they notice humans.” -Kiriyama

Kiriyama-san made a disgusted face as she recalled various things.

“If we determine that the goblins are making unpredictable movements, we’ll shoot up to three with guns. If their movements are predictable, we’ll proceed as planned. I’ll make that call, okay?” -Rokujou

“OK.” -Kiriyama

“And if it comes to close combat with the goblins, don’t panic and use a combat knife.” -Rokujou

“Got it. Oh right, I forgot you had a combat knife. I’m forgetting a lot of things.” -Kiriyama

It’s safer to always reduce the goblins to three, but being too cautious might prevent magic or skills from emerging. It’s bad for our status growth as well. If we play it too safe now, we might get stuck later on. So, this is judged to be the best approach.

“Let’s go then.” -Rokujou

“Yes, sir!!” -Kiriyama

We looked around and soon spotted a group of six goblins.

“Yuuta. Six goblins to the right front. No other goblins around.” -Kiriyama

“There are some more in the back, but given the goblins’ detection abilities, they won’t notice us if we deal with the six that Misuzu found first.” -Rokujou

“Understood. Let’s approach from the front.”  -Kiriyama

We started to approach the goblins. The goblins hadn’t noticed us yet. We crouched down in the grassland to get closer. As we got closer, the equipment of the six goblins became clear.

“Three of them are normal ones with swords or combat knives. One’s an archer. The other two are big.” -Kiriyama

“Hmm.” -Rokujou

This was a different pattern than we had anticipated.

We hadn’t thought about how to deal with the big goblins. Goblins are usually about the size of a sixth-grade boy, but some are the size of adult humans. Naturally, the bigger they are, the stronger. Until now, they had been shooting us without question.

“What should we do, Yuuta? We were planning to take on four regular ones. Shall we just shoot the archer and the two big ones with guns?” -Kiriyama

“No, since the adult goblins will be bigger targets, why doesn’t Misuzu try shooting us with the bow? As for the goblin archer, I’ll go forward and block the arrows with a shield. If the goblin archer stays back to shoot, we’ll take down the archer with arrows too, and the two of us will handle the three regular goblins. How about that?” -Rokujou

“Umm, I don’t know if it’ll work, but shall we give it a try?” -Kiriyama

“Let’s do that. We’ll switch to guns if we deem it too dangerous.” -Rokujou

If things didn’t go as planned, we would mercilessly eliminate them all with guns. We decided on the plan, and Kiriyama-san aimed with her bow and arrow. She shot sharply, and the arrow hit a regular goblin holding a combat knife. It was supposed to hit the adult goblin, but it hit the one it wasn’t supposed to.

“Hmm.” -Kiriyama

“Pfft.” -Rokujou

“Don’t laugh, okay? It’s actually pretty difficult.” -Kiriyama

Things rarely go as planned. Being more than 100 meters away, it’s no wonder the arrows didn’t hit their mark as intended. It’s rather impressive that they were aimed well at all.

I took the opportunity while still at a distance from the goblins to aim my handgun with both hands. Closing one eye, I peered through the dot sight and took careful aim.

*Bang bang bang bang bang

Bang bang bang bang bang bang*

As the group of goblins charged, only the goblin archers hung back, drawing their bows. The distance was still significant, but I didn’t hesitate to use six shots to take them down. Aiming was indeed difficult at that range, but firing more shots helped.

Then I took down another adult goblin with my handgun. I had to switch to a spare gun when I ran out of bullets. Meanwhile, Kiriyama-san managed to hit a goblin with another arrow, immobilizing it completely.

“Alright. Kiriyama-san, you handle the regular-sized ones. I’ll take on the big one.” -Rokujou

“Leave it to me. I’ll do it right next time.” -Kiriyama

We calmed ourselves, waiting for the enemy to approach.

Conveniently, an adult goblin swung a huge club at me. My arms tingled as I blocked the blow with a protective shield, but I wasn’t immobilized.

I drew my katana and slashed sideways.

The adult goblin’s belly was sliced open, spilling its entrails. Yet it didn’t die instantly. When it kept moving, I swung the blade down from a high position, cleaving into its skull halfway and cracking open its cranium.

“Good.” -Rokujou

I kicked the adult goblin’s head away and withdrew my sword. Kiriyama-san was dealing with two attackers at once. She thrust one with the blade protruding from her cross spear and dodged the second’s attack.

“I won’t just be beaten!” -Kiriyama

She quickly pulled the blade from the first goblin and stabbed again. But during that time, another goblin lunged at her. Without panicking, she drew her combat knife and plunged it into the goblin’s flank. The goblin that had clung to her slid to the ground.

Kiriyama-san then stomped down hard on the neck of another goblin, crushing it. She also ran over to the goblin archer, who had been disabled by arrows, and finished it off with her combat knife.

“Good, good, this is how it should be.” -Rokujou

Kiriyama-san, covered in blood from using the combat knife and sporting a bright smile, looked terrifying depending on the viewer.

But in the dungeon, that appearance is correct. Once we both got the hang of it, things moved quickly. If we thought it was impossible, we would shoot without hesitation. And when we could, we would follow the plan and shoot with the bow. As we got used to it, even facing two on two wasn’t a struggle.

I once tried to take down a goblin archer without using a bow or a gun.

Honestly, that was the most challenging. Long-range attacks are terrifying when you’re on the receiving end. Nevertheless, I took the lead and blocked the archer’s arrows with my shield. Once I closed enough distance, I could move faster than the archer could shoot.

“You start to realize they’re not much of an enemy after all,” Kiriyama-san said, relaxed, as she stabbed a goblin archer in the heart while speaking. Like Kiriyama-san, my resistance to killing goblins was fading.

“Yeah, if this is what it’s like at level 2, then by level 3, we won’t be able to level up here anymore.” -Rokujou

I also talked while stabbing a goblin with my sword.

The more accustomed we became, the more efficient we were. We took down a significant number of goblins by mid-morning. After surpassing sixty kills, lunchtime arrived, and we took a break.

We ate in a space where no goblins were left, thanks to our rampage.

The area was littered with goblin corpses, and even the herbivorous animals were too scared to come close. Still, the fact that we could eat here showed how much we had adapted in one day.

“Here, some barley tea.” -Kiriyama

Kiriyama-san poured some barley tea from her water bottle into a cup and handed it to me.

It was quite hot, so the cold drink was refreshing. Our lunch menu consisted of convenience store-bought onigiri. I was very hungry after moving around so much and ate five onigiri with salmon, bonito flakes, and cod roe. Kiriyama-san ate four.

“Phew, I could eat more, but it’s probably better not to stuff ourselves too much.” -Kiriyama

“Haha.” -Rokujou

“Why are you laughing? Yuuta, you’ve been a bit rude to me since earlier. Maybe four onigiri are too many for a woman.” -Kiriyama

“No, it’s not that. It’s just strange, you know, eating onigiri with Kiriyama-san here, surrounded by goblin corpses.” -Rokujou

“Well, that’s true. It’s strange to be doing this with Yuuta. And you’ve gone back to using my first name again.” -Kiriyama

“Oh, right, Misuzu.” -Rokujou

I was getting used to calling her by name without any reservations, but when I let my guard down, I would revert to calling her Kiriyama-san.

“Well, it’s typical of you, Yuuta. Oh, you’ve got a grain of rice there.” -Kiriyama

Kiriyama-san naturally reached out to my mouth and picked off a grain of rice, then brought it to her own mouth.

“It’s strange to be treated like this by a girl.” -Rokujou

“I also find it strange to be doing this to a boy.” -Kiriyama

We looked at each other and laughed.

“Misuzu, about fifty more to go?” -Rokujou

“Yeah, fifty goblins for level 3, right? So, about that many. By the way.” -Kiriyama

“What?” -Rokujou

“After eating, I, well, feel the urge.” -Kiriyama

Kiriyama-san said awkwardly. She had already had a few accidents due to sudden urges, but that was three or four hours ago, and since the dungeon was hot, we had been hydrating frequently.

“Ah, actually, I also need to go to the bathroom. Should we head back to the dungeon shop?” -Rokujou

We could still make it back since it was only the first floor.

“No, not that. Yuuta, I want to go here because I feel the urge.” -Kiriyama

“Like, you can’t hold it in?” -Rokujou

I recalled Kiriyama-san’s image when she had an accident after being attacked by goblins. I wondered why she had held it in until that point.

“I won’t have an accident! That’s not what I mean. We’ll probably reach level 3 by the end of the day, right? Then we move on to the next stage. We have to find the staircase down to the second floor, running around in a circle with a diameter of 100 km. In other words, we have to stay overnight in the dungeon.” -Kiriyama

“Oh, yeah, it’s an overnight stay.” -Rokujou

An overnight stay in the dungeon is something explorers can’t avoid. The first floor is still manageable to return from, and I had initially planned to be alone, so without a lookout, I had to return. With that in mind, I had told Imari that I would be back by evening.

But two people can stay the night. If we can stay, then it’s common sense for explorers to do so. Especially for those aiming for level 1000, it’s better to get used to staying overnight in the dungeon early on.

“By tomorrow or the day after, we’ll have to stay inside the dungeon. Right now, it’s only possible to return to the dungeon shop for bathroom breaks. That’s why it’s better to get used to it, right?” -Kiriyama

Looking at Kiriyama-san’s face, it had turned a slight red.

“Get used to it…” -Rokujou

“Yuuta has already seen various things, and I’m not embarrassed, so I’ll go first. After I’m done, it’s Yuuta’s turn. No problem, right?” -Kiriyama

Kiriyama-san… no, Misuzu declared this and then took off her holster and pulled down her pants. Her underwear was visible. It was white. The sight of her white thighs and sweat-dampened panties jumped into view.

“Yuuta, are you going to watch me do this until the end?” -Kiriyama

“N-no, sorry!” -Rokujou

Misuzu’s accusing gaze as she was about to touch her panties. I definitely didn’t have the courage to keep watching. I stayed alert, making sure that no monsters would approach us. The sounds that reached my ears couldn’t be ignored, but I tried not to pay attention.

Still, I couldn’t help but be concerned about whether it was okay for me to hear these sounds, and I felt anxious. Eventually, the sounds stopped. Next, I heard the rustle of clothes.

“It’s okay now.” -Kiriyama

When I looked at Misuzu, she had adjusted her clothing.

Feeling embarrassed about my own disappointment, it was now my turn. Knowing Misuzu was close by made me nervous, and it was hard to start, but eventually, I managed to finish.

“Misuzu, this is like that, huh. It’s okay because it’s only a small matter.” -Rokujou

“Yuuta, I’m already prepared for that, so don’t worry. But…” -Kiriyama

Misuzu looked at me intently.

“What?” -Rokujou

“Just so you know, I don’t do this kind of thing in front of other guys. Don’t think I’m a girl without delicacy.” -Kiriyama

“Eh, but what if you have to enter a dungeon with other guys?” -Rokujou

“I haven’t planned for that, so I haven’t thought about it.” -Kiriyama

“I see…” -Rokujou

I felt relieved, even though I wasn’t her boyfriend. It seemed clear that Misuzu trusted me quite a lot. That made me genuinely happy, and I realized once again that I indeed liked her.

Anyway, from there, we struggled against goblin archers and adult goblins, but eventually, Misuzu was able to defeat a solo adult goblin on her own. And just when it seemed like we were about to level up,

“Is this…? Yuuta, come here!” -Kiriyama

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